xenoscience

To Chancellor Alastric Emmannulas Noens pel Colophon the Grey, XVIIth Gryphonhorn Magus, Th.M. M.Ex. O.S. Esq.

Chancellor,

I am writing to share some serious concerns regarding one of our students at the College of Martial Magick, which I have unfortunately been unable to resolve internally through dialogue with the other faculty of the College. I believe this matter requires attention and action from the University administration, in order to ensure that the mission and educational principles of Aletheia University are upheld.

The student in question, Susan Surn, joined the College of Martial Magick via our Combat Trial Admissions process. Her score was apparently the fourth-highest anyone has achieved since the College’s founding, and as this year’s Combat Admissions Supervisor, Senior Professor Blatchley was quite enthusiastic about her performance.

However, during the very first practical recitation of my Advanced Combat Rituals course, it became abundantly clear to me that Susan Surn has no thaumaturgical aptitude whatsoever. When asked to perform Relter’s Strengthening Charm, Surn merely spat on her knuckles, and proceeded to punch a training dummy through the wall. Her attempt at a Kalixian Defensive Ward was a single circle sloppily drawn in the dirt with her foot, and a threatening glare which prompted her assigned sparring partner to excuse himself from the remainder of the recitation. For her demonstration of the Fifth Rite of Destruction, she pummeled the target with both fists while shouting some sort of repetitive battlecry, until nothing remained except fine rubble. When I pointed out that these were simply acts of physical violence and not spells at all, Surn replied that they were “somatic components.” This appears to be the one piece of terminology she has retained from my lectures, although I do not believe she understands what it means.

To Chancellor Alastric Emmannulas Noens pel Colophon the Grey, XVIIth Gryphonhorn Magus, Th.M. M.Ex. O.S. Esq.

Chancellor,

I would like to apologize for my outburst during my visit to your office last month. While I was indeed quite upset by the verdict of the CDLXXIIIrd Disciplinary Council, my tone was nevertheless inappropriate for a professional setting, and my personal remarks were entirely uncalled for. I must also acknowledge that, while I still have some concerns regarding Lilias Calbach’s future pyromantic research even with Professor Tarkovsky’s now-mandatory pre-approval and oversight, my judgment of Calbach may have been slightly harsher than was necessary.

This past week, to my consternation, Calbach arrived nearly half an hour late to her Council-mandated duties assisting with the cleanup and restoration of the Library Wing. She did not appear to have slept or bathed the previous day, and brought with her a large handcart filled with notebooks from the University Depot. When I demanded to know the reason for her tardiness, she gave no reply, and merely handed me one of the notebooks from her cart. Opening it, I was astounded to discover Chapters V and VI of Kyrius’ Quaestio Radix Magia, which had been completely destroyed in the recent fire, with no other known extant copies. To the best of my recollection of the grimoire’s contents, the reproduction in the notebook was flawless, including the illustrations and diagrams. Examining more of Calbach’s notebooks, all of them contained similarly perfect reproductions of rare texts I had believed irrevocably lost. Upon closer inspection, the notebooks’ contents were clearly not inked by a quill or printing press, but scorched into the pages. I turned to her in pure astonishment and asked how this could be possible; she responded simply “The fire remembers,” and promptly fell asleep on one of the couches we had salvaged.

The Appearance of the Blaze (燚, Itsu), written by Kaen Homura (火焱 炎) and translated by Matthian Brimm, is a text on pyromancy which, while highly regarded in certain thaumaturgical circles, has largely faded into obscurity in the present day. Eschewing the traditional four-elements-based introduction to the field, The Appearance of the Blaze instead begins by setting out what Kaen calls “the Locus of Exothermic Transference”, and uses this to derive equivalents of the foundational laws and formulae of pyromancy from first principles. The grimoire goes on to apply its unique methodology to elucidate a wide variety of advanced pyromantic spells and rituals, exploring the field through a pedagogical route which often cuts back and forth across commonly-established subdisciplines. In his foreword, Brimm writes: “Kaen’s novel approach casts a new light on the field of pyromancy from an entirely new direction, and there is much to learn from the different ways in which our shadows align.”

The grimoire was held up as groundbreaking by Brimm’s disciples, as well as a few pyromantic luminaries such as Heleth Namien the Gold and Vicator pel Critanis the Blue. However, it ultimately failed to gain much traction in the broader pyromantic community, which largely continues to favor more traditional expositions such as Green’s Fire and its Refinements and Marbel’s Elemental Principles series.

Although there are still copies of The Appearance of the Blaze in circulation, the grimoire has become increasingly difficult to obtain as time goes on. The publication run of Brimm’s translation was quite limited: according to the records of the Nova Astra publishing house, only 200 copies were ever printed. The grimoire’s occasional tendency to spontaneously combust has both exacerbated its rarity, and made it riskier and more challenging to keep shelved outside of major thaumaturgical university libraries with the resources to invest in specialized archival storage.

To Chancellor Alastric Emmannulas Noens pel Colophon the Grey, XVIIth Gryphonhorn Magus, Th.M. M.Ex. O.S. Esq.

In Re: CDLXXIIIrd Disciplinary Council

Chancellor,

Thank you for your letter, and for allowing me the opportunity to share my thoughts in advance of the council proceedings. As you know well, I am usually quite loath to involve myself in administrative matters such as these, and I hope that the length and swiftness of my present appeal may further testify to the depth and urgency of my feelings regarding this case.

You are as aware as I am of the extremely high academic standards to which Aletheia University holds every one of our students. It is with this in mind that I must stress, with no exaggeration whatsoever, that Lilias Calbach is without question the most gifted pyromancer I have ever had the honor of teaching throughout my entire career.

I freely acknowledge that I was skeptical when Professor Yeboah first urged me to admit Miss Calbach to the College of Elemental Magick on a Special Commendation Scholarship. What could a young adult with no prior thaumaturgical study, indeed no clear prior academic background whatsoever, possibly contribute to Aletheia University? And yet, as the Professor described Miss Calbach’s performance in the practical interview she had conducted, I too felt my curiosity piqued. Using only her own intuition, along with a badly-singed copy of Kaen’s The Appearance of the Blaze that had somehow found its way into a city library, this young woman had seemingly taught herself the fundamentals of pyromancy completely independently over the course of a few months, attaining a degree of control on par with a typical incoming elemental-track student, and a level of raw power far beyond one. When Professor Yeboah asked how she had been able to accomplish this, Miss Calbach apparently responded that “you just need to ask the fire how it’s feeling.” Seeing the Professor’s insistence, I decided to trust in her judgment, and granted the scholarship as requested.

“I’m not tryna like, belittle your line of work or anything – there’s a lot of people out there who need to get carried over to the afterlife and all that stuff, it’s great that you’re helping out with that! I’m just saying, it’s really not that hard to not die, everyone else just isn’t trying properly.”

Mori stared blankly at the girl. “Look, – Vivian, right? – it’s really not that simple. There are so many ways a person can die, you can’t seriously expect to avoid all of them.”

“You just gotta take reasonable precautions, that’s all! I eat healthy, I drive safe, I work out – I can take anyone in a fight, y’know?” She flexed a bicep demonstratively, and Mori couldn’t help but have her gaze drawn to Vivian’s toned muscles… But, wait, no! That’s not how –

“That’s not how it works! Look, even if you can avoid all the usual causes of early death, you’re still going to get old eventually!”

“Nah, I’m good.”

“You’re – ?! No, you –” Mori wasn’t sure how much of her exasperation was due to her close personal connection to the topic at hand, and how much was purely a reaction to Vivian’s infuriatingly blasé attitude. “Listen, your cells – they have chromosomes, which have all your genetic code, which tells your body how to make everything it needs in order to function properly, right? Every time your cells divide, there’s some portion of the very ends of your chromosomes – the telomeres – that just gets lost.” Mori gesticulated with her fingers to try and illustrate the process of telomere shortening. “Eventually important parts of your chromosomes get damaged, your body stops functioning properly, and ultimately it breaks down and dies! It’s just a fundamental aspect of human biology!” She realized that her gestures really weren’t helping to explain her point, and also looked kind of sexual. She slammed her hands flat on the table, and stared back at Vivian, red-faced, from annoyance. Obviously.

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“DEFENDER TO WITH SHINING AS AWAKEN!” hold with call voice we together. Go fly do light magic out to transform face with Unraveling save right.

“No, she shouldn’t! Don’t listen to her, Tomoe.”

“C’mon Tomoe, you gotta shoot your shot!”

“You really think I should, Touka?”

“Touka no! What would Tomoe even say to her? ‘Hi, I’m the magical girl who held you hostage the other day, wanna get coffee?’”

“I’m just saying, she looked like she was kinda into it!”

“WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK, pyon?!”

“Damn, I didn’t know mascots could swear.”

“Shut the fuck up, pyon! You tell me you’re not convening this weekend, Maki leaves me at home to ‘run some errands’, and the next thing I know, every channel is playing live footage of you all BLOWING UP A FUCKING OFFICE TOWER, pyon?! The Miracle Bunny Pretty Defenders are supposed to protect the world in the name of love and justice, not destroy it, pyon!”

“Sorabank have spent half a century using their hoarded wealth to exploit workers and pollute the planet, I’d say blowing up their HQ is absolutely in line with our mission.”

“Plus we used the massive magical power spike to one-shot The Night Unending on our way home, you should be over the moon!”

“Also, we’re the Miracle Bunny Liberation Front now. It’s like you didn’t even watch the video we released, sheesh.”

“What the fuck does that even mean, pyon?! If you’re going to use your Miracle Crystals to murder people, then I need to take them back for the good of the world, pyon!”

“We all know you’re bullshitting, Pyonpii. Remember when Tomoe was in tears, begging you to let her quit? And you helpfully explained how our Miracle Crystals are permanently bound to our spirits, and can never be given up or taken away? Which, by the way, was conveniently absent from your whole pitch when you were handing these out in the first place…”

“Anyway, we’re keeping civilian casualties to a minimum! We went through firing warning shots to get everyone out of the building before we set off the thermite!”

“Look, I’m sorry, but the skimpy outfits are absolutely vital, pyon! Magical power is fundamentally derived from the attention and strong emotions of other people, right? When you’re up against small-fry demons, you can get by with just a group of friends who care and believe in you, but we’re in the big leagues here, pyon! If you girls want to stand a chance against The Night Unending, widespread parasocial attachment rooted in sex appeal is your only option, pyon!”

“What about Sparkling Duet Revolution Hearts? They take down powerful demons all the time, without a single panty flash!”

“Those two are top idols, pyon! I’ve heard you singing karaoke, none of you should be quitting your day jobs, pyon.”

“… So basically, we need as many people as possible to be thinking about us and having strong feelings about us, right?”

“That’s right, pyon!”

“Cool. Hey girls, who wants to start a terrorist group?”