“I’m not tryna like, belittle your line of work or anything – there’s a lot of people out there who need to get carried over to the afterlife and all that stuff, it’s great that you’re helping out with that! I’m just saying, it’s really not that hard to not die, everyone else just isn’t trying properly.”
Mori stared blankly at the girl. “Look, – Vivian, right? – it’s really not that simple. There are so many ways a person can die, you can’t seriously expect to avoid all of them.”
“You just gotta take reasonable precautions, that’s all! I eat healthy, I drive safe, I work out – I can take anyone in a fight, y’know?” She flexed a bicep demonstratively, and Mori couldn’t help but have her gaze drawn to Vivian’s toned muscles… But, wait, no! That’s not how –
“That’s not how it works! Look, even if you can avoid all the usual causes of early death, you’re still going to get old eventually!”
“Nah, I’m good.”
“You’re – ?! No, you –” Mori wasn’t sure how much of her exasperation was due to her close personal connection to the topic at hand, and how much was purely a reaction to Vivian’s infuriatingly blasé attitude. “Listen, your cells – they have chromosomes, which have all your genetic code, which tells your body how to make everything it needs in order to function properly, right? Every time your cells divide, there’s some portion of the very ends of your chromosomes – the telomeres – that just gets lost.” Mori gesticulated with her fingers to try and illustrate the process of telomere shortening. “Eventually important parts of your chromosomes get damaged, your body stops functioning properly, and ultimately it breaks down and dies! It’s just a fundamental aspect of human biology!” She realized that her gestures really weren’t helping to explain her point, and also looked kind of sexual. She slammed her hands flat on the table, and stared back at Vivian, red-faced, from annoyance. Obviously.
“Sure, other people’s chromosomes suck at copying stuff down properly, but you just gotta put in the effort. I’m great at taking notes, my cells should have it all figured out.”
“……”
“All you gotta do is pay attention and take care of yourself properly. I really don’t get how so many people mess it up, honestly.”
Mori pinched the bridge of her nose. This clearly wasn’t working, she needed to take a different tack. “Look, it’s – there’s a pattern, a rhythm of the universe, that’s shared by all living beings.” She dredged her memory for Teacher’s exact words. “Birth. Life. Death. Every soul has its time to go, to return to where it came from. Even stars and planets share in the same pattern, just much larger and slower. It’s not a bad thing, it just… is.”
“If my soul’s really got a time or whatever, then show me where it says when and how I’m gonna die. Your boss has like, hourglasses or books or something for everyone, right?”
“I – No! Giving mortals information about their deaths in advance is absolutely forbidden! You have no idea how much trouble I’d get in if I shared that with you, and regardless, I wouldn’t dare risk the kind of harm to the fabric of reality that could result from –”
“Sounds like excuses to me. Scared you’re gonna check and find out I’m right?” Vivian asked with the most obnoxious smug little smirk.
“I am not – GRAAARGHH!!!”
“Welcome home, Mori. How was the party?”
“… Fine. It was fine.” Mori put her ankle boots neatly on the shoe rack, then shrugged off her jacket and hung it on the coat tree by the entranceway.
Teacher gave Mori a knowing look, her face surprisingly expressive as always, and got up from her chair to give Mori a gentle pat on the head. Mori always found the bony sensation comforting and calming; it felt like home.
“I’m glad you’re making time to socialize with mortals. I always appreciate how dedicated you are to your studies, but it’s good for you to get out and make friends.” A high shrieking whistle sounded from the kitchen. “Ah, the hot water’s ready. Would you like some tea?”
“Yeah, in a minute…” Mori shifted awkwardly. “Teacher, would… would it be okay if I went and looked at the lives for a bit? There’s just something I wanted to check…” She’d never share it, but the mystery was gnawing at her now. Not that she had any doubts about what she’d find! She just wanted to go see. Just because.
Teacher stared at Mori curiously for a few seconds. “Of course, Mori. Every part of this house is open to you. I trust you.” She returned her attention to the kettle. “What kind of tea would you like?”
“Could I have a vanilla hibiscus? Thank you, Teacher.” Mori walked calmly, calmly, up the stairs, and opened the door to an absurdly vast room, shelves lined with hourglasses stretching out as far as the eye could see and then farther still. She strode over to a lectern near the entrance, and opened a massive leatherbound book, impossibly old and in excellent condition. “V, Vivian … ’98 maybe? Aura blue-gold… There we go, shelf צ-113-黃龍-Temperance.”
Mori found a ladder, slid it along its track to the shelf she needed, and climbed up 20 feet or so. Her gaze scanned along the row of hourglasses until she found the one she was looking for. She took it off the shelf and held it up to the light to get a better look, but…
At the foot of the ladder, Teacher set down two cups of tea on a small table, and looked up at Mori and the hourglass she held. “Ah… That one.”
Mori set the hourglass carefully back on the shelf, climbed slowly back down the ladder, walked over to the table, sat down in the chair Teacher had pulled up for her, and took a sip of her tea. Teacher sat quietly drinking tea opposite her, with that particular look she had when she was leaving Mori space to ask questions. Mori took another sip of tea. She put her mug down.
“WHAT THE SHITTING FUC—”